Wow! Such big words! It’s not as profound as you might think. Nowadays, with everything that is going on in the world, around us, and in our own lives, we have to be able to find meaning in our day to day routine. In fact, just being able to go about our day has meaning in itself. It means that you are able to drive around in your car, able to buy gas and have a purpose in going somewhere. You are part of the hum drum, I should say.
Staying home to take care of my son, I would think that there is a purpose for me. From the time I wake up to the time I lay him down to sleep at night, I am continually amazed at how much God has designed my days so that I might not lose track of why, and where I am right now. As I am typing this post right now, I did not start with the direction of where it is going right now. I wanted to write a “gripe” post. Not a “thankful” one. But it is such a wonderment even up to now that in my deepest and sorrowful days, when I feel the whole world is closing in on me, I am immediately revived by the blessings I see and feel around me. Its like in an instant, my complaints give way to thanks. My worries turn into positive thoughts and my energy is renewed!
I certainly feel overwhelmed these days because we are trying to wean my son from the ventilator and it seems we have come upon a roadblock. We have plans for him and the doctors have plans for him. But to Isaac, that is all they are, plans. He will do what he wants to do in his own time. I have learned this the hard way through the 3 years of his life. My only consolation is to communicate to God what we hope to achieve so that he may plant that thought and strength in my son’s brain and body. We are not in control and that is a hard pill to swallow. Patience is the key.